Let Go to Grow

What if the opportunity of a lifetime knocks on your door tomorrow? Are you ready?

I’ve been asking these questions for several weeks now. Some people will say, “it depends on the opportunity.” Others will respond, “I’d make myself ready!”

What if the question becomes, “would you be able to leave your family behind to live on the other side of the country or leave the country?” This question never gets an immediate response. I can always see hesitation and concern on the faces of people who have never left the “nest” to venture out on their own. Living separately from close or extended family is not the same as living away from family.

When asked if a home or property would pose a constraint, anyone I’ve talked to that has lived in a house ten years or more says they would struggle. It’s too easy to accumulate stuff, especially if there is space to accommodate both wants and needs.

For people who have spent most of their life in one place, near family, living in one home, it can be extremely difficult to change, even if a significant growth option presents itself. This is why it’s so important to be able to let go to grow.

Even if the new venture isn’t on the immediate horizon, two critical steps can be taken now to address personal “weaknesses” that would hold someone back from capitalizing on a new opportunity.

Step 1. Assess your family ties. Is your tie to family supporting or strangling? In other words, is close proximity to family your need/obligation (strangling) or because there is a healthy mutual beneficial relationship (supporting)? If the answer is the latter, then distance apart is unlikely to impact a strong functional healthy relationship. If you would describe yourself as having the first type of relationship, then you are more likely to feel trapped by emotional control, manipulation, guilt, and other negative feelings. A form of codependency may have driven your choice to live close to immediate family and remain close because someone or a group of people convinced you that you don’t love your family unless you remain both emotionally and geographically near. Let go of the limiting belief that you are unloving if you choose to live geographically far away from family.

Step 2. Assess your ability to move. Assuming you own a home, how readily could you sell your house and not lose money on it? Have you properly maintained the property by making sure there is no major or obvious work needed (e.g. roof replacement, major plumbing issues, outgrown landscape)? Can you honestly say that everything you have is worth packing into a box and moving? Even if there is no immediate reason to move, take the appropriate steps today to prepare your home for a quick sale. While the purpose of this blog is to promote letting go to embrace growth opportunities, it could just as easily be taking steps to mitigate risk in the event of death, job loss, or natural disaster. Let go of the “stuff” that is not adding value and invest appropriate time and resources into preparation for future growth.

If these steps pose a major challenge, especially if you believe there is no reason to take action without a known growth opportunity or established timing, consider talking with people who have moved frequently or chose to live far away from family. Even if the circumstances are vastly different, there is a lot to learn from other people’s experiences, mistakes, and successes. If you’d like to share how you’ve let go to grow or what’s holding you back, please do so in the comments below!

©Room2GrowGarden.com, June 17, 2018

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